The first disappointment came when I gave my 4th period students their Romeo and Juliet Act I tests back. Two students (we'll call them Ruby and Nate) had been really participating in the class discussions all week. They'd worked hard, and felt confident going into the test. When they got their tests back, both of them were disappointed to see that they hadn't done nearly as well as they thought. Ruby's eyes filled with tears, and she put her head down; Nate began mumbling to himself angrily, and I could tell he was beating himself up about the bad grade. I love, love, love these two kids in particular, and it broke my heart to see them work hard and still not be successful. I wanted to cry for them, right there in class, but I knew I couldn't instead I made up my mind to do whatever it takes to help them get where they need to be academically.From there, 4th period just got worse. As we started reading through Act II, I would stop frequently and make sure the students were paying attention and understanding the text. But every time I would ask a question, they would all just stare at me like I'd just ask them to recite the quadratic formula or something. I would repeat it, then one or two students would half-heartily throw out an answer, but even then I could tell that they hadn't thought it through at all. They simply refused to respond to me, and looked bored out of their minds. I looked to the back of the classroom for help from Coach, but he was working on the computer and didn't seem to notice that I was plummeting to my lesson's death. I pressed on, and we kept reading, though I know they weren't even trying to keep up. After what seemed like ages, the bell FINALLY rang. They left, and I wanted to follow them out the door, get into my car, and get as far away from that classroom as possible.
Lucky for me, my 5th period class has to be the most social and outgoing group of students ever. They seemed to notice that I was upset about something, because they kept telling me jokes and trying to make me laugh. As we got started reading, and I assigned parts, I was thrilled when almost all the hands went up. The rest of the period was the polar opposite of 4th period- they were awake and interested and talkative every time I stopped to ask clarifying questions. The boy who was reading for Romeo did such a good job with the "lovey dovey" expressions and motions, and got the whole class laughing. I love 5th period so much for boosting my spirits back up and making me feel like I wasn't a complete failure.
So, like I said, this is the worst day I've had so far in my three weeks of student teaching. But ya know, if this is as bad as it's been so far, I must say, I still feel so incredibly blessed. My "bad day," though it was a little discouraging, wasn't even all that terrible. I realize that 4th period is just a tougher group of students, and I need to find ways to get them alive and involved. But overall, I still love what I'm doing as a student teacher, and I still love my freshmen!


No comments:
Post a Comment